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By David J. Fekete
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Extra resources for A Rhapsody of Love and Spirituality
125). Aware of his own ploys, Ovid’s advice to women seeks to keep them from being trapped by one of his own male pupils. Men can be sweet-talkers in order to get what they want, particularly if they are writing and have time to think up honeyed words. Women need to carefully consider the words they are hearing and determine whether they are all pretence or whether they are heartfelt. 43 A Rhapsody of Love and Spirituality But he arms women with tricks of their own. Keep the man guessing for a while.
177). Ovid pities the women who don’t reach climax, and sex requires particular sensitivity. Arts are most needed as we try to discover what moves our partners best. 44 44 Chapter II. The Lover’s Coach and the Apple Fallen from Plato’s Tree: Ovid and Aristotle Only by intimately knowing our partners are we able to provide the stimulus that they will respond to, before, during, and after sex. In the act of sex, all the arts of love find their culmination. It is fitting that Ovid concludes his great manual on loving with a comment on the art of sex, with ecstasy either real or pretended.
Aristotle says that for friendships of utility, the friendship is a secondary concern. Our own benefit is our primary concern and “friendship” is a way to get it. This is not true friendship, because our primary concern is not the actual person him or herself. Aristotle says that old people tend to form friendships of utility, because they have more need to be taken care of. We don’t even have to like the other person, in a friendship of utility. The “friendship” will endure as long as one derives a benefit from the other.